First, let me apologize in advance to anybody that has ever worked for, currently works for, or ever aspires to work for the fast food chain, SONIC:

They are morons.

I am sick at home right now suffering from Influenza Type A. Goody for me, right?

WRONG.

First, I've not slept well, I've had the chills, a horrible headache, and I'm popping more pills than Robert Downey Junior.

But yesterday I had to go Freeman Urgentcare. (Once again I was angry because the Elvis impersonator who does the music on their radio commercials, yeah that guy, he was not there AGAIN. One of these days when I have to visit Freeman Urgentcare he will be there, and when I see him, I will kick him squarely in the nuts.)

I stopped at Sonic first. I ordered a Route 44 Diet Sprite. A DRINK.

The girl brought it out. By itself. I paid for it. And as I rolled up my window, she quickly stepped forward and asked me, and I'm not making this up:

"Do you need any ketchup with that?"

Seriously.

Ketchup.

For my Diet Sprite.

I just stared at her for a moment, my brain racing through countless smart-hiney comments. I started to say, "Yeah, baby. Load me up with ketchup. Nothing goes better with Diet Sprite than fifteen packets of Heinz Ketchup. Num-freakin'-num!"

But I resisted the urge and merely responded: "No."

She smiled and carried on, oblivious to the fact that just by talking to her my IQ had dropped another 4 points. I can't afford to lost anymore.

Peace, my children!

Man I'm getting old....last night at the church league basketball league I hurt back BAD. I had blocked out to get the backside rebound on a horribly errant shot by my buddy Matt. I skied up (and by skied up I mean actually left the ground) and grabbed the ball......but as I leapt I got undercut by a little bitty point guard. He slipped and fell, and as I was in the air directly above him I had the choice of falling down directly on him with my knee square in the small of his back or falling off to the side. I nobly chose the latter and when I did I landed with my legs at an angle that pulled a back muscle on the right side of the small of my back. It HURT. I pulled myself out of the game, went home and popped three Advil. I DID NOT want to get out of bed this morning.

But the lesson of the evening I learned the most: you cannot beat a man to man defense if the point guard never leaves the top of the key. It doesn't matter HOW much movement the rest of us do.

Amen.

Ever been stuck in a presentation so boring that you would SERIOUSLY rather gouge your eyes out than continue to suffer in?

Well, I'm in it right now. Seriously, this sucks.

Ever been stuck in a presentation so boring that you would SERIOUSLY rather gouge your eyes out than continue to suffer in?

Well, I'm in it right now. Seriously, this sucks.