Something just happened to me that REALLY ticked me off, and it shouldn't have, because it really wasn't that important. I just ordered two drinks at Sonic for my wife and me. The total was $3.18, I gave the greaseball (does he not wash his hair?) $3.20. He just said, "Have a nice day," and took off.

He stiffed me two cents! TWO CENTS! Since the title of my blog is My Two Cents, that irked me! He just assumed that I was giving him two cents! What made him assume I wanted to give him anything?

Most of you will read this and say, "What a cheapskate."

Yeah, maybe so.

But doggone it, that made me mad.

I normally don't tip at Sonic. What is the point? They grab my bag inside, walk it twenty feet to me outside, take my money, and go back inside. Whoop-tee-darn-doo. I used to pump heads (that means pumping out the chemical toilets, you perverts) on large boats at the Yacht club in Michigan, and that was so disgusting I about gagged, and guess how often I got tipped by the multi-millionaires whose poop I was hosing out?

Very little. So I am not going to weep for the Sonic-onians.

I will make allowances on certain occasions. If it is REALLY hot or cold outside and they're extremely busy, or if they're having to walk in the pouring rain or sleet to bring me my food, I'll throw in a little something extra. In my more intemperate youth, I am ashamed to admit, we'd often go to Sonic in a pouring storm and park at the FURTHEST out parking spot just to make a couple girls we hated have to get soaked bringing it to us. That was cruel, I know. But that was a long time ago.


Anyway, if I'm going to sue Sonic on North Main Street in Joplin for two cents. I'm going to have to find a VERY cheap lawyer.